It takes a village... (ahem, how much does a wedding cost?)

At first, Ralph and I planned and expected to pay for our own wedding. We figured $10,000 should have been enough to cover it. We are lucky we had lots of help, because our wedding ended up costing more than double that. Keep in mind that we busted our butts to keep costs as low as possible, while not putting out our friends and family. So now, I unveil our wedding budget - but know that it took a whole village to throw this event in terms of emotional, financial, and logistical support.

Wedding Day Costs
Ceremony Site Fees: $350
Reception Site Fees: Included in food costs: $0
Food/Drink (includes tax and service fees): $7,802
Bridal Gown: $2600 for the gown, $50 pressing: $2,650
Bridal Accessories:
*Veil $40
Bracelet/Earrings $40
Shoes $20
*Bra/Garter $40
Groom’s Attire: FREE! Deal w/ 2 other rentals. $0
Stationery/Postage (DIY): $162
Photo/Videography: Won Contest! Only paid for travel related costs of the couple $1,600
Ceremony Music: $350
Reception Music: $800
Flowers (DIY): $400
Cake: (upgraded package) $65
*Favors (DIY): $50
Officiant: $400
DOC: FREE! Won contest! $0
Makeup: (@ counter included trial =$90/4 items, failed trial at counter = $50/3 items) $140
Hair $100
Wedding Party Gifts $210
Out of Town Guest Bags $100
Hotel Rooms: $700
Décor:
*Tablecloths (bought used) $120
Chargers (rented from a friend) $45
*Escort Frames $45
*Glassware/Misc Décor (most of the vases were gifted to me) $120
Flip Flops $50
Wedding Transportation $300
*Sold Leftover Items: -$260

WEDDING DAY TOTAL (excluding non-food related gratiuties): $16,439
TOTAL COST PER PERSON: $193

Other costs
Wedding Band: (Mine was bought w/ my E-ring) $70
Rehearsal Dinner: $900
Day after Brunch $400
Honeymoon: also used Frequent Flyer miles $3,600

OTHER COST TOTAL: $4,970

GRAND TOTAL: $21,149

Wow! That figure kills me. I mean that is 10% downpayment on a trailer home where I live :-)

Anyway, looking back, where would I have trimmed? Nearly nothing. I would not have liked to have an Ipod wedding (why do that to a friend?). Our officiant was wonderful, and worth every penny. I am glad I didn't put out my parents and make them host any event at their home. I am glad we hired a limo - EVERYONE was on time!!! My dress, albeit a huge splurge, was (1) cheaper than the first dress I fell in love with, (2) perfectly made to my body, and (3) AMAZING! I will probably sell it and hopefully recoup half its cost. I mean, I acted as our florist - can you be anymore of a cheapskate? As far as the guestlist, well I am sad that close to $1000 was spent on dinners that people simply did not show up for - but what can you do? I think we are both content with who we were able to invite.

PLUS, we had a blast at our wedding and honeymoon (we hadn't been on a real vacation in many years)!!!!

Thanks to my all Moms and Sister (you are my faithful readers too) for making it happen - there is no way we could have pulled this off without all of your love and support. I love you and miss you - J!!!

Wedding Day Run-through: the final, most fun bits!

Again, sorry for the grammatical errors.

Pretty much all of these pictures are from rock star Jade at Uplift Photography.

8:10 pm: Reception time! A panicked DOC tells us that two couples have no seats. I immediately feel that I must have screwed up the seating. I later learn that our venue only put 8 instead of 10 seats at one table, and another couple just flat out refused to sit where they were assigned. It all worked out in the end, because of a few no-shows. But I was kicking myself around for a good amount of time over it. I, then, exchange my evil heels for my ballroom shoes. Ralph and I dance as husband and wife. We do what is comfy for us and had a great time with each other being silly.


Next is the parent's dance. I immediately hear the song and wonder why the DJ had to pick the longer live version of Fleetwood Mac's Landside. I hate recorded live music played at events. My dad does a great job for a man that hasn't danced in close to 25 years. We have a fun time being silly too. I notice that Esther loves our song choice.

(I love how cute Ralph and Esther look here. The look I am giving my dad is awesome!)

Toasts are wonderful by our siblings. Donna was awesome and gave an unexpectedly non-sarcastic speech. Dave's speech was exactly what I expected. I hoped that everyone got his humor. I certainly did and I loved it.



8:20 pm: Dinner is being served. The seated appetizer was horribly disappointing. I LOVE crab cakes, but this one tasted eh, and the sauce is much too spicy for a broad audience. I eat like 3 tiny bites.

(apparently Adam liked it and even ate the crayfish garnish)

The Hearts of Palm salad eventually comes out, but where are the Hearts of Palm? It is good, but where is the best part? I get some aspirin in me, now that I have food in my belly, and immediately feel better. The main entree takes forever to come out and Ralph and I are ansy to go to each table and visit with our guests. I finally take a bathroom break by demanding that my new sistah Donna come to help me go. I return to find my entree, which is in some serious need of salt. I can't find the salt, as it was hidden behind the flowers, I eat three bites and then go and visit the tables. Our DJ tells us that we are running late due to the very slow dinner service and need to start the music. We hold him off for a bit to go and visit the tables, but we still miss 2 tables. I still feel really bad about this.


Now, I have no idea about time....

• With no headache anymore, I finally drank some Champagne. I think I drank a single glass over the entire night.
• I had a blast on the dancefloor and was so glad that Ralph stayed with me.

• I kept complaining about the heat. It was hot the moment we walked in - what was up with that?
• I noticed people with no shoes and then kindly asked someone to make sure that the flip flops were placed out. They finally appeared and I directed the barefooters there. It was a hit!

(I think this is a Marjie foot)

• The DJ played all the songs we requested and included a few songs that were right up our alley, however, they weren't mixed that well and he cut out alot of the crecendos and best parts of songs. Ralph and I were really sad about this, but understood that he needed to fit all our "must play" songs into a limited amount of time since dinner took too long. It didn't ruin anything for us and we were happy that the dancefloor was always kicking.
  
• We visited with people outside, where it was much cooler. I danced a bit out there too.

• My mom was in the bathroom during the playing of Dancing Queen. I tried to find her, but I didn't look there.
• I kept checking in with my Dad who was very amused at all the fun people were having.
• Cake cutting time. We had no idea what to do! We winged it and then winged it again.

• Garter removal. I had no idea what was coming! I sat out there and for some reason had no idea what the DJ was going to do. Ralph's dance was soooo classic Ralph. I love that he chugged the beer - because he knew what was coming.

• Bouquet Toss. Totally planned. I knew exactly who I was throwing it to. She just moved, but then actually caught it.

• Garter Toss. I see that my brother Dave actually went for it.

• More dancing insues. Ralph stayed on the dancefloor all night.

(Ralph's Grandmother - who rocked it all night. She says that this is the way she is 90-something young)

• We end the night with one slow song (Clapton's Wonderful Tonight) and then go into Journey's Don't Stop Believing. Somehow we become encircled as we dance/sing the silly song. The funny thing is that Journey followed us on our honeymoon and had a concert right next to our resort. We totally tailgated and stayed for half the show. I have a feeling that Don't Stop Believing was saved for the last song too. I was too chilly to wait for it.

• I try to give away as many flowers as possible. I snag a bunch of leftover favors. I try and help with clean up as Ralph yells at me to stop. I give in and we head off to our sassy little Chevy Cobalt. People keep telling me that the limo is waiting for us... he he, that ride was for my parents and family.
• We go back to the hotel room only to find this (thanks to Heather, Emily, and Corey)....

There is no other way to say it: we had a freaking blast!!!! Thank you to everyone. xoxoxo

(my amazing necklace was Ralph's gift to me - it was the most perfect gift ever)



(Our last day in Hawai'i, walking the coastline)

Wedding day run-through continued

Note - I sincerely apologize for my gramatical errors.

Hmmm so where did I leave off....

4:1o-ish pm: Ralph and I are taking pictures. The limo arrives and my brothers come in the lobby only to see me stretched out on the chaise lounge taking bridal portraits. I try and look serene. Ralph and I leave to take pictures in a dirty stairwell, while the limo and my family wait.

4:30-ish pm: I leave in the limo with my family. Shockingly, it is only very lightly sprinkling. Meanwhile, Ralph and my big brother Dave drive together in our sexy getaway car.....



4:35 pm: In the limo, I down our water bottle and eat a melting chocolate energy bar thanks to Janet. I can't believe that I did not get chocolate on my dress. I still have a terrible migrane. Phone calls go back and forth about whether we take pictures at the dock behind our venue or not.



4:45 pm: We arrive at the dock behind our venue to take more pics only 15 minuutes late. I get out and the rain and crazy wind make me change my mind. I get back in the limo and we are driven to the venue entrance. We arrive to see our new ceremony space. I think it looks just fine given our situation. I later learn that Ralph was so terribly disappointed with it. There is lots of talk about still trying to move it outside between me, Ralph, Esther, our DOC, and staff at the venue. I put all the desicions on Ralph's head, since my brain left like it was going to explode.

5:00 pm: We take family portraits. I can't believe that Ralph and I forgot to make a list of pictures we wanted. Our photographer does really well considering our oversight. All our family was on time and fully coorporates - I have a great time seeing everyone looking so cute and happy. I think my eyes stayed open during the picture-taking.

5:30-ish pm: Ralph and I try and take some outdoor portraits. We run into a zillion people coming to another wedding right across the way from us. They are surprised to see a bride that they don't recognize. It is still drizzling so we take some pics under covered areas, except when Ralph wasn't looking I posed for one in some great foliage getting slightly wet in the process. As we begin our return to the VIP room, we run into some of our early arriving guests. They are pretty surprised to see us.

5:45-6:15 pm: I hang out in the VIP room; I am standing not sitting, as the families come and in out. Head is absolutely killing me. My mom is trying to make thank you cards and divvy up tips. I sip on some Sprite and Coke. Why is there no water around????? Bass music is pulsating through the room, and I ask Ralph to take care of it. He does and gets them to also tone down the steel drums from the wedding I ran into (I had no idea). I cannot belive that all 3 events are going on at the same time in the same location, as they promised that it would never happen, but tell myself to save the angry for later. I do exactly that.

6:30 pm: Showtime! I walk in, or more like stumble. My footing was really off especially with both my parents by my sides. Our officiant signals for us to slow down, since the aisle is ridiculously short in our new space. My feet are KILLING me for standing up in the VIP room for so long. What was I thinking? I manage to cry gracefully (I think) , but facing our friends and family and not completely bawling out of such happiness was really hard. As we say our vows, I remember to bend my knees so I don't faint or anything. I try hard to listen to what our officiant says. But I am so distracted by Ralph and being ridiclously happy to remember it all. I snatch my ring by accident - whoops. I put Ralph's ring on him exactly how I was instructed NOT to do. We have no problem kissing each other, which was a problem at the rehearsal. Then we disappear to the VIP room.

7:00 pm: Picture time in the park. But first we go down another dirty staircase. It is still too windy for the dock. We take pictures on some bridges and by some waterfalls. A server offers us some appetizers, and I force one down, but I still feel ill. We walk into the mulch to take some shots under a huge Banyon tree (Ralph can't believe I can do this in heels and in a wedding dress). We go to our original ceremony site and cocktail site for some pics.

7:49 pm: My veil taken is off and we return just to catch the end of the cocktail hour. We are greeted by a claps and cheers. I couldn't be more happy. Flavia gets Ralph a beer and gets me some water (begrudgingly, I might add). I eat another appetizer or two, but I just feel too ill to eat. I hope the water kicks in to help my headache.

Okay, all the rest in one more post.

"My husband"

I just love saying that. I went to a shindig (yes, I used that word) tonight and got to introduce Ralph as what he really is. It was cool.

But, I still don't have weddings completely out of my head since I am currently trying to unearth all our leftover wedding stuff.

Anyway, as I was talking to one of my moms today, it occurred to me that I perhaps I should recount what my wedding day was like...

All pictures are from my amazing girl Jade of Uplift Photography.

7:15 am: woke up 30 minutes early. Immediately begin making boutonnieres in bed. I remember how much I hate to wire orchids. Am somewhat stressed at how non pretty they are.



8:15 am: Meet Ralph in lobby for quick breakfast. We are pretty relaxed.

8:45 am: Start making corsages, which go by really quickly. Very relaxing.



9:20 am: Jade comes by to keep me company and take some shots. I start making Donna's and my bouquet.





10:30 am: My mom picks me up for my 11am hair appointment.

11:00 am: I am waiting and waiting with people ignoring me at the salon.

11:20 am: Finally meet my stylist, who immediately pegs me as a bride. I lie and say my updo is for my mom's b-day gala.

12:50 pm: Stylist finally finishes my updo after rushing through the end. I have to repeatedly tell her to do something about my frizzies. I wish that she knew I was a bride, so she would know that my hair is really important. Why did I bother saving a buck? Then I remember that it is a $100 hairdo. I am not cheap, it is just an overpriced hairdresser!

1:00 pm: I get to my makeup appointment just in time. Filberto is totally ready for me and has everything laid out for me.

1:10 pm: I notice how crappy it is outside and it starts raining. I think it will pass.

1:30 pm: I get THE call. The venue calls my cell to determine if we should move the ceremony indoors. I have 15 minutes to give them an answer. I immediately call Ralph, who is miffed at having to give our decision so soon. Many phonecalls occur about this (Filberto is super cool and understands). Ralph then calls in a panic as he gets kicked out of his hotel room. Massive headache sets in.

2:55 pm: I get back to the hotel, a little over 3o minutes late. I am completely unshaven and have NO time to take a mini shower. I dry shave my underarms. I am totally mortified that I have forgotten to take care of this simple task, but know that Ralph will not be surprised or upset.

3:15 pm: Photographer and videographer arrive in my room. I tie the ribbons on the bouquets. I have a hard time with mine and tie it over and over. I am trying to stay calm. I think I get a few more calls about moving everything inside.



3:40 pm: Jade comes over and helps me put my dress on. I didn't even think I would need help with this - duh!



4:10 pm Ralph and I take pictures in the hotel and wet garden. I feel better with him by my side, but still with massive headache. I need to drink water desperately.

I'll wait to detail the rest of the day tomorrow or so....

Updates!

1. We did get caught with the cat, feigned ignorance and paid the $100. We were even asked to see our receipt while boarding our connecting flight. Oh well! The monster is very content right now.
2. We booked our ceremony musician. She is awesome. Ralph is the best for encouraging me to keep looking and not settle for muscians I really didn't want and obviously didn't need the work. I think she will be worth the wait.
3. My mom rocks for being my DIY helper extraordinaire. She surprised me with some stuff and helped me out a ton today with more craftiness. M-LEE, she loves the runners and your handiwork!
4. Our venue... ah our venue. Yes, they managed to throw some more curve balls my way. They have 3 events booked on our wedding date with one event (of over 1000 people!) practically colliding into ours in not just one but two occasions. It took over two hours, but Ralph and I worked well together and compromised with them. In the end, we will actually be benefiting from this, but I will never again trust anything they say that isn't in a contract (not that they could read one anyway). It is all about $ and our measly 85 person wedding that booked first, means nothing to them in comparison to the 1000 person corporate retreat or whatever.
5. That crazy woman was a b$&ch again to my mom over the phone - she better not be to me. I am ready for that throwdown.
6. Yes, I know that in the end all will be great, but they are certainly making us work for it!

T-minus 16 hours...

until we leave for the airport. Yes, I should be finishing up writing my own recommendation letter right now (gosh I really hate that BTW), but I am going to relieve some stress online. Here are a list of my random thoughts...

1. I tried on my dress last night after I took a shower. I still need to buy some Hollywood tape so my bustier doesn't show - I forgot to pick that up at the bridal salon. I can SO not lose anymore boobs. I also can't gain any pouch (just say no to the cabbage). Makes me wish I didn't go for such a form fitting dress.
2. I can sit in my dress. Yes, I was stupid and didn't try that. It is probably one of the first things my mom taught me about shopping for clothes.
3. I am chancing it at the airport tomorrow and am not paying the $100 to reserve my cat a spot underneath the seat in front of me. American Airlines has NEVER checked for my receipt (but United has). If they do, I will feign ignorance. I am hoping that the big white bag that Ralph is carrying on will be my diversion.
4. Still don't have a contract for ceremony music. I have a tentative meeting date, but that is it. Apparently musicians are doing just fine in this economy and don't need gigs.
5. Our venue cracks me up with their lack of detail orientation. It makes me feel like I am crazy picky. For instance, don't tell me what my appetizers are - in our contract it is written that WE get to choose 10 out of the 30 appetizers - not you. WTF? If I was crazy picky about this stuff, I would have a ceremony musician by now.
6. If that crazy woman from the venue that raised her voice at me is anywhere near me on my next set of visits, I swear she will regret it.
7. I forgot to mention that I can't wait to be married (FINALLY) and go on our honeymoon.

Off to Miami (er Fort Lauderdale)!

OMFG!

There is really no classy way of putting it - sorry. I am addressing this to my venue catering manager - for the umptenth time, can you PLEASE read my contract and get the time of our wedding right? Pretty please!!!!! No she doesn't read this blog, but I just had to vent this out.

Leaving to Miami in T-minus 50 hours. Zillions of work-related things to do in between now and then. Must remember to eat or dress will not fit. Ralph tells me I should try to load up on calories now. He he, I love this man!

Unsettled thoughts

Most of our friends are still struggling graduate students or at the beginning of their careers. And as the majority of them live in other states and even other countries, we anticipated that making such a trip to our wedding would be difficult in terms of their time commitments and monetary restrictions. However, what I did not expect (and I say I because dear Ralph is not surprised in the least) was that several of my family members are choosing not to come. Some hurt more than others. It probably bothers me so much because the biggest reason Ralph and I are even doing this whole thing is to formally celebrate our happiness with our families.

What I am conflicted most with is how to convey how distraught I am at what I perceive as my (yes, they are all from mine) family members' lack of caring. I honestly don't know how to let them know other than being formal with my thank you note... "thank you...... we wish you could have been there... yada yada yada..." Very unsettled indeed.

However, be rest assured that I am looking on the bright side of things.

I am a sucker for contests

I entered another "contest" for free Day of Coordination (DOC) services. This one isn't a popularity contest thankfully. I really really hope we win, because the latest mess from our venue is very upsetting. It is far too complicated to blog completely about it, but to summarize....

(1) Our original coordinator left. In getting a new coordinator we found that....
(2) Our 25% off catering discount was never put through. In getting a new contract to reflect the promised discount, we found that...
(3) They weren't sure what our wedding date is (I'M NOT KIDDING)
(4) The Plan B in case of bad weather was not reserved for us.
(5) The ceremony site was listed as the incorrect location.
(6) The reception site was listed as the incorrect location.

Now you might be thinking... did we even bother to read our original signed contract? Of course we did and the original one was perfect and had all the right details in it. I have NO idea, where all the confusion came in when drafting the new contract.

Sooooo.... I have little faith in our new coordinator (apparently she can't read a contract), so a DOC would be great to insure everything goes as planned the day of (and if it doesn't, she'll fix it and never let me know). Check here on January 25th to see if we win her services.

Oh and I am flying directly to Miami upon leaving Europe. We got a mess on our hands that requires more than emails and unanswered phonecalls! In the meantime, Ralph is trying to get me revved up to get me to go all bridezilla on them. He thinks that is the only way to get them to do anything right. I think he might be right.

Annoyances, but not wholly unexpected ones

After a little over a week of unanswered emails from the catering coordinator at our venue, I received an email informing me that she was no longer with them. Well, I was pissed to say the least, but I will admit that it wasn't completely unexpected. It is not that I didn't like her or anything (quite the contrary) but when we signed the contract with her a year ago, she was brand new and had a long history in the hotel catering biz. It sent up a few pink flags in my brain. Coupled with the fact that this has happened to several other brides, in several other South Florida venues, why couldn't it happen to us?

It couldn't have been worse timing though, considering that we aren't scheduled to be back in Miami until the week before our wedding. Why of why weren't we informed while we were in Miami???

The good news is that our new coordinator has been their awhile, and what I have heard about her is very good (hence yesterday's google search).

The bad news... well some important things that I expected her to know about us, things like who our other vendors are, well she didn't have any record of these things.

There is so much minutia in party planning, that I am so scared that I don't know all the things I need to review with her.

Well, we will see - I am trying to stay positive.

Another somewhat positive outcome is that I also learned that the catering discount we were supposed to be getting from a third party was not put through. This in itself a big deal! Our new coordinator was able to give us all the info to get this all straightened out.

Oh headache!

I've turned into a wedding planning monster

No, not a bridezilla, but I have become quite engulfed into this process. My friend, Lauren, who recently got married somehow managed to avoid this. It also could be due to her having a very hands on, fiance/now husband. I remember how Lauren and I laughed over the enivitable question "so what are your colors?", as in wedding colors. Oh how silly that seemed. But now I have changed my tune.

We (I) already picked our colors out. I have even gone as far as to pick our wedding theme. See, I told you I turned into a monster. Before I reveal our theme, I'll state the reason for having one. Really it is to keep a consistent style throughout the whole ceremony and reception. I actually think it has also been very helpful in restraining me from purchasing random stuff that is unneeded and does not fit our "theme" well enough.

Some themes from other brides-to-be visualized by things called "inspiration boards" (all submitted to Weddingbee.com):

Azalia's "Gothic Princess Wedding"

Kalnc's "Picnic Lunch"

As for Ralph and I, well, we are keeping it simple. Given our venue, we (I) decided that we are having a "Modern Tropical" wedding. What does that mean? Really, just that we aren't having a throwback tiki party (Emily would love that, huh), or a beach wedding, or a cheeztastic palm tree adorned everything wedding. Something simple and something that works with the venue, rather than against it. I am not sure how my dress fits this theme, but I don't care. I love it and it fits me at the very least. Oh, and maybe if I find some extra time, I'll make one of these inspirational boards like these talented ladies.

How to turn me into a ...

BRIDEZILLA!

(From organizeddoodles.blogspot.com)

No not really. But I did get really mad and in front of my soon to be Mother in Law recently due to some miscommunication at the cake bakery. It was kinda embarrassing. But I think I did pretty well considering I unleashed my wrath not at the poor lady that just came back from vacation, but outside on the streets of Coral Gables.

What happened? Well, with our venue, we have the option of getting our cake at Cake Designs by Edda, which is an institution in Miami. They even have 4 locations in South Florida. In March, I went to taste some cake in their Doral store. They were really busy and didn't treat me so great. So, I figured I would try the Coral Gables store while I was visited Miami in June. I called them up to make sure that they would have all the flavors and fillings I wanted to try. The lady strongly assured me that I needed no appointment and that they would have all those flavors and fillings. This is cool because it is actually posted on their website as a FAQ's:

3. When can I come in for a tasting? Anytime, but it is always best to call in advance to make sure we have specific flavor available for tasting.

	4. Do I need an appointment? Appointments are not necessary, though recommended for special occasions. Appointments can be made Monday through Friday at any of our store locations.

So me, my mom, Ralph, his mom and her partner all stroll in the store on a Monday to eat some cake. Cue to the poor lady who just came off of vacation, she tells me that they have no cake and that the cakes for tasting won't come in until the afternoon. WHAT? They have no cake? All the moms drove an hour for nothing? She finally offers us their signature flavor cake (Vanilla Rum), which I decline since I already know Ralph hates rum cakes. I ask Ralph to please "take care of this" so I won't bite this persons head off. He gets us a firm appointment for the following day, while I yell an obscenity outside.

The following day... all come again, except Ralph's mom's partner who has to work:-( The lady at the counter kindly tells us,' Oh no, we only do tastings on Wednesday.' WHAAAA? That isn't posted anywhere? What the hell? I just look at Ralph, who then asks for the poor vacation lady. Poor vacation lady comes out behind the counter and knows that I am pissed (I have a hard time hiding those sort of facial expressions). She then very kindly takes care of us and even gives us second helpings to bring home to those who actually work. The cake is good, damn good. It is a good thing too. I was at the point of 3 strikes and you are out. Although, I have to admit that I am quite concerned that they will screw it up. End the end, we are supposed to get a very simple 3-layer round buttercreme cake with strawberry jam filling (how hard is that to mess up?). Now I just I have to bribe someone into decorating it like this for me:

(theknot)

So will it work with all green orchids? Should we have sprung the extra $ for sugar orchids instead?

Venue Decisions

Continuing from my last post.... after lunch at the Van Dyke Cafe, I called up the coordinator at Jungle Island and asked if we could take another visit. We checked it out, and we were just as pleased with it as we were a few hours before. We toured the park a bit, and then I had to say goodbye to Ralph's moms. My mom and I stayed until closing, though, and saw the world's largest crocodile in captivity, Crocosaurus. They also have the world's largest cat, Hercules, which just so happens to be a liger.


FUN STUFF!

So, my mom and I went home and discussed which venue would be best, either the Jungle or The Spanish Monastery.

It actually wasn't a hard decision. One was more us, easier to deal with, and best on the pocketbooks. So, yes, Ralph and I will be married among the crocs, liger, and all the parrots at Jungle Island. Crazy, but true.

Venue Reviews - Day 2

Another early morning adventure... We started off by going to Jungle Island. It is located very close to Downtown Miami and South Beach.



It is very convenient to get to. I was really concerned that it would be too theme park-like. But when we entered the building it was nothing like Disney World or any of those Orlando theme park attractions. I guess it has something to so with it being so new. The coordinator in charge of us, showed us around for the potential outside spots. It was lovely and so much better than any of us expected. And pricewise - this place was within reach.


Then, we headed to the beach to the Miami Beach Botanical Garden. I feel bad about this place, because I couldn't help but compare it to Fairchild. That is a very unfair comparison. It is a lovely garden, but it is tiny. The room and the outside area that we would have for our reception was right next to the highway.



That pretty much killed it for me. In hindsight, I shouldn't have even considered this place, because there is also no parking for guests. That is something I just don't want to deal with.

So, we headed to the Van Dyke Cafe on Lincoln Road for some great food and terrible service (see that it what happens when they automatically include an 18% tip).

As I sat there enjoying my company and the Florida weather, decided to cancel the rest of my appointments for the day. I made my decision that it was going to be between two of the venues.

Venue Reviews

I promised to talk about all the venues I perused in March. I had a 2 day whirlwind adventure with my mom, and Ralph's moms. This is what we did on Day #1:

(1) We first visited Cauley Square in Cutler Ridge. It was a bit of a hike to get there from the airport area. There isn't too much by there either. Hotels in the area are even a bit sketchy. But still, the tropical garden was too beautiful to pass up a visit.

However, it is a bit cramped in person. But what really turned off of this otherwise lovely location, was their bathrooms. They were tiny and really rustic. Now I am not a prissy girl, you should see some of the places or lack thereof I have "gone". But for my wedding, I am not offering my guests in their fancy garb a lavatory like that. Yeah, that bad.

(2) Next we saw the lovely Deering Estate. Honestly, I love this place. However, they were terribly strict about that number of guests we could have that would work with our budget. It is too bad, because it is really pretty:


(3) Right by there is a place called Palmetto Bay Village Center. It is the old headquarters for Burger King, that has now been renovated as office space. The place is huge and had some lovely options for us.

Potential cocktail area

Potential Reception site

However, we agreed that it is a tad too modern for us and not warm enough for our personalities.

(4) Then we raced from South Miami to North Miami to the gorgeous Spanish Monastery. These pictures don't do it justice.

Potential ceremony site

Potential reception area

The bad thing was that no Saturdays were available for March. That didn't thrill me, plus it was a bit more than I wanted to spend. But it is very lovely and therefore an option.

Whew! That was a long day. But that didn't stop me from dragging my mom to Laurenzo's, an amazing Italian Market, and then Krispy Kreme (my #1 guilty pleasure).

Next up... Day #2

Timeline schimeline

Any place you go to learn about weddings and wedding planning, you will find that there are helpful timelines to help the clueless (I mean most people, I assume, have never done this before). Each month or so, they give you a whole bunch of checklists of what to do. See what the website theknot tells me to do:

4/18/2008 - 5/18/2008
THIS MONTHS TO DOS

		Choose a color scheme, if you so desire, taking into account the decor of the rooms/areas you have reserved for your ceremony and reception.
		Start investigating any ethnic customs or cultural traditions you might want to incorporate into your ceremony or reception.
		Start auditioning reception bands or DJs.

Here is another one from the magazine Real Simple Weddings:
It is nice to have. The only problem we are having is that our schedules don't exactly mesh with these timelines. We travel apart and often, so scheduling is critical to our sanity. Put wedding planning on top of all that and you have a mess. Here how one of our conversations go:

Me: So how long do we have together before one of us leaves?
Him: Ummm 1.5 weeks, then I go to Costa Rica for 4 weeks and then I am back for 3 weeks and then go to Brazil for 3 weeks.
Me: And when you are in Costa Rica, I am in Belize for 4 weeks and then I am back for a week and then I go to Brazil for 2 weeks.
Him: So how long do we have together this summer - only 1 week?
Me: Yep - I guess we gotta go register then.

So for pretty much everything on those checklists we have to do quite far in advance. Otherwise, one of us (most likely me), has to make an executive decision. I am not too pleased about getting behind on these checklists, but it looks like it is going to happen, since there is no way I am auditioning DJs from CA. I only hope we start investigating traditions by May 15th:-)

Venue bashing

While researching venue locations I was shocked, SHOCKED, at what some of these places charge and what they give in return. One of the places I fell in love with was Fairchild Botanic Garden in South Miami. I became smitten with this place while taking one of my botanical courses, where I often had to tour the very large and grand garden. I often saw weddings being set up there. Even though I was single at the time, I envisioned my wedding there amongst the gorgeous meticulously cared for plants.


For about $7500 it can also be yours. Yes, that is right, it costs almost as much as my car did when I bought it 5 years ago. What, you may ask, does $7500 get you... 6 hours in the garden with 100 of your closest family and friends (beyond that is $20/person extra). That is it, no catering, linens, tables, chairs - nothing. Well, since I am on a budget, this place was simply out of the question.

Other exorbitant places include the lovely Vizcaya in Coconut Grove (over $12k), the Deering Estate (only about $5k) in South Miami. What is even more shocking is that these are all county Parks. Again, for these prices you get the pleasure of some of your friends to be there for a few hours. You still have to hire their security guards, use their over priced tent company, pay for janitorial services and additional permit fees, and follow their very strict rules. This is, of course in addition to all the food, rentals, and entertainment. Well, many people have that much dough to throw away. While touring the Deering Estate, I found out that they are booked solid every weekend (even in the nasty hurricane season).

For awhile I thought we weren't going to be able to afford an outside garden wedding in Miami. Thankfully, we did find a place that is much more affordable, without sacrificing too much. But more about that in a later post.