"My husband"

I just love saying that. I went to a shindig (yes, I used that word) tonight and got to introduce Ralph as what he really is. It was cool.

But, I still don't have weddings completely out of my head since I am currently trying to unearth all our leftover wedding stuff.

Anyway, as I was talking to one of my moms today, it occurred to me that I perhaps I should recount what my wedding day was like...

All pictures are from my amazing girl Jade of Uplift Photography.

7:15 am: woke up 30 minutes early. Immediately begin making boutonnieres in bed. I remember how much I hate to wire orchids. Am somewhat stressed at how non pretty they are.



8:15 am: Meet Ralph in lobby for quick breakfast. We are pretty relaxed.

8:45 am: Start making corsages, which go by really quickly. Very relaxing.



9:20 am: Jade comes by to keep me company and take some shots. I start making Donna's and my bouquet.





10:30 am: My mom picks me up for my 11am hair appointment.

11:00 am: I am waiting and waiting with people ignoring me at the salon.

11:20 am: Finally meet my stylist, who immediately pegs me as a bride. I lie and say my updo is for my mom's b-day gala.

12:50 pm: Stylist finally finishes my updo after rushing through the end. I have to repeatedly tell her to do something about my frizzies. I wish that she knew I was a bride, so she would know that my hair is really important. Why did I bother saving a buck? Then I remember that it is a $100 hairdo. I am not cheap, it is just an overpriced hairdresser!

1:00 pm: I get to my makeup appointment just in time. Filberto is totally ready for me and has everything laid out for me.

1:10 pm: I notice how crappy it is outside and it starts raining. I think it will pass.

1:30 pm: I get THE call. The venue calls my cell to determine if we should move the ceremony indoors. I have 15 minutes to give them an answer. I immediately call Ralph, who is miffed at having to give our decision so soon. Many phonecalls occur about this (Filberto is super cool and understands). Ralph then calls in a panic as he gets kicked out of his hotel room. Massive headache sets in.

2:55 pm: I get back to the hotel, a little over 3o minutes late. I am completely unshaven and have NO time to take a mini shower. I dry shave my underarms. I am totally mortified that I have forgotten to take care of this simple task, but know that Ralph will not be surprised or upset.

3:15 pm: Photographer and videographer arrive in my room. I tie the ribbons on the bouquets. I have a hard time with mine and tie it over and over. I am trying to stay calm. I think I get a few more calls about moving everything inside.



3:40 pm: Jade comes over and helps me put my dress on. I didn't even think I would need help with this - duh!



4:10 pm Ralph and I take pictures in the hotel and wet garden. I feel better with him by my side, but still with massive headache. I need to drink water desperately.

I'll wait to detail the rest of the day tomorrow or so....

I am officially a bride...

now that I have my dress. Yes, today I went in for my third and final fitting at Amy Kuschel's flagship store in San Francisco. She is so beautiful, but was actually a tad imperfect when I tried her on. The only embellishment on it was put in the wrong spot. However, since they make all their dresses on the floor above their showroom, it was just a short 10 minute wait for me to have my dress to take home.

Fifth floor showroom and sixth floor design studio
(credit Uplift Photography)

I cannot stress how pleasant this whole process has been. The staff there are just impeccable. I felt like I was special (without having my butt kissed) throughout the whole process... trying on, buying, and all the fittings. I have found that it is super common for wedding people to treat you great right up until after you sign your contract and then all bets are off. Not here.

This was by far my biggest wedding splurge thanks to my wonderful parents. And in the end, I think I got a deal of a lifetime. Honestly, the price can't be beat considering the dress is made in San Fransisco with wonderful natural materials, and fits my shorty self to a "T".

So now, she is hanging in my closet, which is now off limits to the Gaia Monster. Check her out...

how do you like that name?

This is all you get of the final product until D-day

Thanks mom and dad!!!!!

Second dress fitting sneakpeak

My awesome friend at Uplift Photography took these amazing shots at my second fitting. I wish I could share all of them, but I don't want to ruin any surprises. I just had to post these, though. She is so talented!!!!

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Just an update

I love my dress. They really do wonderful work at Amy Kuschel and have just been awesome. My lovely girl Jade took a zillion pictures and it was obvious to everyone there at the store that she is a pro photographer - they were loving her pictures. There was even an exchange of business cards - too funny. Anyway, Jade helped us out so much in so many ways. She is in arts and crafts pro herself and was great to have my friend by my side. Thanks so much Jade - YOU are the best.

More first fitting pics

Compliments of Heather who was kind enough to take only like a bazillion pictures of me. Here is my super inexpensive second-hand veil in the sample dress. It is exactly how I hoped it would look with the dress.

Some more pictures of the first draft. I love that they drew on it.


I had to include this one, because Heather finds it so humorous. They were letting out the hips, and she managed to capture this.


I must have been in mid sentence, but it looks as though I got pinned like a voodoo doll.

And my dress. Sort of...

Today was so exciting! Heather, Stephanie, and my mom accompanied me to San Francisco for my first fitting at Amy Kuschel. The lady who took care of us (for the life of me, I can't remember her name) was sweet enough to have the sample dress already out for me to try on for everyone.

It was a great opportunity to try on my undergarments and veil. Pics to come.

Then they put me into the first draft of my dress, based on the measurements they took about 8 months ago. It was an simplified version of my dress in acetate, almost like dress lining. It had no zipper (I wore some demure undies!). And then they got to work on me...

(hey girls!!!)

They had to let out the hips some and take in the bust (big shocker!)

And then I was pretty much done. Not too bad.

Yeah, I am making faces, but I am really happy. Wow, I just realized that I have a really short waist! Heather and I should switch our body halves!

Anyway, when they were done pinning, they then drew all over the dress with Crayola markers. Not kidding!!!! They marked a bunch of incomprehensible things in different colors. No this won't be my actual dress, just a prototype. Come January, it will be the real deal. I can't wait.

My crowning glory

I never thought I would wear a veil. Never! Ralph and I even talked about it. He really hoped I wouldn't. Then I tried on this Pronovias dress.

And then they put it on me.

And I knew I had to wear a veil.

For the record, I love this dress, but it just didn't feel like the dress I would marry Ralph in. I know that sounds weird - but it works in my silly head. It would definitely be the dress I would wear if I was having a frilly, vintage-insipred, garden party wedding. And that sort of wedding wouldn't work for Ralph - therefore it wasn't meant to be the dress I would marry him in.

When I did find THAT dress, I put on this simple veil.

But in the end I decided to go for a longer veil. Why? Well, because of this...

Credit - the wonderful Zlatko Batisticho

Aren't they beautiful? You are a gorgeous bride J!

I like the drama from the back. I can't help it! So when I stumbled upon a bride selling her long simple veil for a fraction of the price (for reference that veil I am wearing in my dress cost a whopping $125), I jumped on it. In addition to saving lots of $, I couldn't be happier that I am re-using a perfectly good piece of tulle. We may not be throwing the most green wedding ever - I am trying to do my part when I can.

And so here it is, on the pretty bride I bought it from (wearing a dress I did try on)...

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I received it today in perfect condition. I can't wait to try it on with my dress (which is coming up very soon). I promise to post pics!!!

So excited!

My mom is coming to visit us and to come to my first dress fitting. I couldn't be more happier that she will be here with me!

Keys to planning on a wedding from afar (part 1)

I don't have a wedding planner and I don't really have time during the day to talk to people on the East coast (damn the three hour time difference). Add in my routine trips to remote places out of the country, and you have very little time to get things done in regards to vendors and planning my wedding. Given this, I thought I would jot down a list of things that have made my life easier.

(A) Using as few vendors as possible. This leaves you with fewer people to coordinate with. Seems simple, right? Well, not necessarily... by doing this you might lose some of your originality/creativity and maybe even pay more.

For example, my venue includes, catering, cake, bar, tables, linens, chairs, and chinaware. They have a great menu, and their chef has been amendable to a certain dish that I will discuss later, but if I wanted something really out of the ordinary I might be SOL. As far as the rest is concerned, it is all standard white stuff. If I want something colorful and fancy, like what you see below, I would have to hire another company (or two) to accommodate me.

My reception venue with fancy linens, chairs, and charger plates supplied from an another vendor.

If your venue doesn't include catering, I found that some caterers will also will rent linens, tables, and chairs, but at usually higher costs. When they pad their rental fees with little things like $2 more per chair and $0.50 extra a napkin it really does add up.

THE most adored of wedding chairs - the gold chivari. Would you rather pay $10 or $6 to rent these suckers each?

So do be wary of all-inclusives. You need to know how much things cost. Which lead me to...

(B) Being knowledgeable about costs. I did some homework early on and tried to get as many quotes as possible. For me, it was all through email or from internet sites. This is great as it helped me make a reasonable and realistic budget. It gives you a very quick idea of the vendor you are working with. Are they totally trying to fleece you or are they too good to be true. It will also give you an idea of what figures to throw out when negotiating. It also doesn't hurt to get non-wedding costs (i.e. catering for a non wedding 4 course meal). I tried as often as I could to not mention the W word - but it wasn't always easy.

(C) Communicating with other brides. This has been a lifesaver for me. By talking to other brides, I was able to get valuable vendor recommendations. In the case of of my DJ, due to the overwhelmingly perfect reviews - I only had 2 interviews to schedule and only one I actually attended. It was so wonderfully efficient. For each service needed, I have had about 2 to 6 vendors that I have deemed appropriate to contact based on reviews and price range. I can generally get this list culled down to 2-4 by the time I actually need to interview them in person. And when you have only a week at a time to visit your hometown, this is a key timesaver.

As an extra bonus, by communicating with other brides, I also became privy to all sorts of deals and discounts. Two really great ones included 25% off my total venue and catering costs(!!!) and $150 off my bridal gown. I would have NEVER known about these hidden little gems had I not talked to others. Two great sites to meet other brides in your neck of the woods are the local forums/boards at theknot and weddingbee.

A recent wedding cake eating contest - nothing like healthy(?) competition in the bridal community

I have many more thoughts on this, and will leave it open as to how many parts might remain in this series. In the meantime, what (or who) has helped you the most in planning your wedding?

Checks!!!!

My last post was on my slight compulsiveness to stay on track of those checklists. But we have done so much already, 3 months into planning, that I thought I would share:

1) We have got a venue and wedding date that we like (we did get scooped for ideal date), but that is ok.

2) We have a caterer and cake baker (ok they were included in the venue, but it still counts as 2 checks).

3) I have a dress that I am so in love with (ok not as much as my fiance or cat).

4) We have colors! Yep, we are going for pool blue, lime green, and ivory. No, we aren't having a pool blue-lime green-ivory wedding , but those colors will be in our centerpieces and invites. And with no bridal party, I don't have to make my girlfriends and family wear those colors, although it might be fun to do that to them too (go go bridezilla).

5) We have a guest list that makes us both happy.

6) We have witnesses/"the signers"

According to theknot, I have completed 42 checks, and have 184 to go. That means I have done 18.5% of the work in 19.8% of our engagement (yes I am a nerd). Damn, I totally thought I was well ahead of the game! It is amazing what a little bit of math can do for your self-confidence. Well, I am still trying to stay on the ball at the very least, as I am off to drag the fiance to get the rest of our very simple vases at 50% off.

Since this post has no pics, I thought I would share my bridal "inspiration"

THE dress and how it came to be

So today I bought my dress! After visiting 8 stores (in 4 cites) and trying on countless dresses, I found it. I found it in the flagship store of Amy Kuschel in San Francisco. I had never heard of this designer before, but on my hunt for pre-owned wedding dresses, I found a pretty dress by her. Intrigued, I checked out her website only to find that dresses bought in her SF store are custom made for each bride, but don't carry a couture price tag. While browsing her site, I found a style that I loved almost as much as The Jillian from my last post. I had to wait 8 long days to get my appointment to try it on, but boy was it worth it.

Once there, I was treated very well, better than any store down Miracle Mile. And the actual store is situated below their pattern/dress making floor, which is very cool. I was put in about 8 dresses total. First, I put on the dress I picked out online and really loved it. I then proceeded to try on the other dresses. At this point, I know very quickly if a dress works or not on me. None of them were for me. I put on the first dress again and then I knew. How did I know? Well, it was just me. Not overly ornate (in terms of wedding dresses), with a touch of whimsy and old school glamour, all while being pretty darn modern. Plus it had the requisite bit of drama in the back. But the real "tell" was my physical reaction to it all. I felt nauseous and even faint while they took my measurements. I couldn't stop my hands from shaking! The funny thing is that last time I had that nervous nauseous feeling was when I first started dating Ralph. I felt so ill, I couldn't eat and lost about 10 pounds. So I feel that it is fitting that the gown I am going to marry him in gave me the same feeling that he gave me 10 years ago.

In the end, I am going to have The Hayworth custom made to my unique body. They took about 15 measurements so far. And after 5 or so fittings, I will have a dress resembling something like what is pictured below, but better (click on the images to make them bigger).....

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It looks like I am popping out of this. But for some reason, my consultant kept pulling the dress down - don't know why

So after all was said and done, I met up with Ralph, still all shaky, nauseous and faint. He thinks I am ridiculous, by the way, for having that sort of reaction. All the same, he took great care of me as we toured the city...

Not a bad day!

Playing Hooky!

Ok well, I had to get in to Bella Donna Bridal in Sacramento this week. I have so many other commitments this week and this weekend, that I had to go today. Bella Donna Bridal is the the only store near me that sells the beautiful Melissa Sweet gowns that I have been loving every time I look in a bridal magazine. I love her styles and the fabrics that she uses, but I so wish they weren't so expensive. Well, enough rambling and on to the pics....

The Liliana...

This pic doesn't do the train justice. It is gorgeous and very full. It is perhaps a bit too full for me and our wedding venue.


And the Jillian....

This one was surprisingly light! I was concerned about the popularity of this dress (a la the last dress in my previous post) and I was assured that haven't sold a single one.
Oh and of course it is the most expensive dress I have ever tried on in my life!

More dress fun-ness!

While I was in Miami, I contemplated another Nicole Miller dress. Unfortunately, the sample was a size 12. Now a size 12 in bridal gear, is usually equivalent to a size 8 in lets say Gap clothes (future brides: just don't pay attention to the size), however, at Nicole Miller a 12 is a 12. Needless to say, the dress literally fell off me.


Now I am not complaining, it is just that it is hard buying a $2k+ dress with only your imagination to help. That is the beauty of Nicole Miller. They are a boutique, so they can do what other bridal shops can't. My lovely saleswoman, called up the other 8 or so stores in the US and found a sample dress closer to my size. She had them overnight it to my house in CA. So, I had a little viewing soiree once it came.
The verdict - where is my waist and hips? And, I would have to cut off a quarter of the skirt (yes I am wearing 4 inch heels). I am so glad I didn't let my imagination run wild and order this dress. So, I shelled out $90 and sent it back. But before I did that, I kept that sucker on as long as I could and played good hostess to my friends and cat.


So in the end, I can say that I am immensely grateful for the customer service at Nicole Miller, but unfortunately this dress is made for a 5'8"+ woman. It is not for me.

Eye Candy!!!

So I found a venue (yes I should say "we", but I really did find it and research it) - more about that in another post. For now, I will chronicle my hunt for a dress.

While I was in Miami, I had to do a bit of shopping with my mom. It was fun, but I definitely had my game face on. Luckily we had no high pressure salespeople. Shocking!

(1) First stop - Nicole Miller

I love this dress, but have decided that I want a little more drama from behind.

(2) Next stop was Coral Gables Bridal where I found this very bridal Pronovias
As pretty as it is, it just isn't what I am looking for.

(3) So, once I was back in CA, I decided to do some shopping on my own at House of Fashion:

OK - I am totally not going to wear this. This is a great example of NOT listening to what others recommend and to not necessarily buy what you can pull off.

Here are two others that I like from this store:

This one fits me on my bottom half, but NOT on the top. So it looks pretty awkward. Although the pics don't demonstrate it well, I do have curves in this dress. I love the drama from behind!

I would replace this with one of my Grams' brooches.

Yes there are cups in there

This one I really liked. Unfortunately, my overworked saleslady didn't take good pictures. As it turns out, it is a really popular dress. So it is no longer an option. For the amount of money, I don't want to wear what so many other brides are wearing. Call me crazy, but I want to have a little bit of originality in my garb.

More soon, as I have appointments set for this weekend!